Tuesday, April 19, 2011

Best or worst resume of all time.

He gets top marks for honesty. I love it! But I probably wouldn't hire him.
Via @lovinmasoldier.

22 comments:

Red said...

This is truly an awesome resume— ne, an amazing resume. It'll be amazing if he ever gets hired...

Teresa said...

This is one example where honesty isn't the best policy.

Funny resume, though.

Opus #6 said...

Red, in this case, I won't call you out for using your own banned words. As they are appropriate here.

Opus #6 said...

T, meow. :-D

Doom said...

Well, with those qualifications, I would guess he is quite on par with most college graduates and more honest about it. Actually, I would give him a leg up on most college grads, who lack the imagination of the inane, the truth behind most of their poor education, as well.

Which means, if I were in a position to hire, I would not consider anyone under the age of 30, and only those who have had a 6 year or more career or been a mother. Yes, having been a mother is far more conducive to responsible, smart, and wise decision-making than almost any degree any college can offer, and by far. (Imagine an Ivy League grad being "stuck" with one baby for six hours... see?) Bah!

Opus #6 said...

Doom, either being a mother or military service. I think both institutions create a tendency for maturity.

LL said...

I think a career as a student majoring in liberal arts at a San Francisco Bay Area university, feeding on student loans and the government tit is in this guy's future.

Or he might be able to live at home until his parents throw him out - at which time he can revert to the program set forth above.

###

The Watcher said...

I got to give him props - he's got a thicker resume than our pResident does.

Kid said...

Merrow baby..

Euripides said...

Sounds just like the opening chapters of Andrew Breitbart's new book. Maybe there's hope for this guy?

WoFat said...

Simple: His dad said "Apply for a job or jobs, unless you want your ass kicked into the street."

darlin said...

Hilarious! I'd like to know when and where this guy gets a job with a resume like this or if anyone will take a chance on him.

LL said...

I'm sure that he'd make a better president than Obama has been. He doesn't claim to be a socialist or communist agitator.

madmath1 said...

Either this is one heck of a hoax, or one of the most amazing resume I've ever seen or heard of: Amazing someone was so stupid to actually send it in. Given the qualifications of most members of our current administration, can I really blame the fella?

Woodsterman (Odie) said...

I liked the days before resumes when you dressed in a suit and looked eye to eye with an interviewer.

fuzzys dad said...

Amen, Odie those were the days indeed.

Z said...

"acne lancer" alone would make me feel too sick to hire the guy!
I wouldn't hire him,either! Not even for Comedy Writer!

Mustang said...

Whoa ... Obama's first name is Eric?

Euripides said...

Good one Mustang! Three thumbs up for that comment.

Just a conservative girl said...

I sincerely hope this isn't real. Leave it Belle to find something like this. She always finds the quirkiest and funniest things.

Trestin said...

I'd likely hire him. No really, this shows a level of creativity that most people lack. Of course I would have to interview him first.

Opus #6 said...

Trestin, the aroma alone was a dealbreaker for me.